INTO THE BLACK

Earth, USA, Iowa. May 3, 2010, 3:21am.

He was alone, as the world below him slept; unaware of his pain. He checked his mobile for possibly the 20^th time. No messages to save him from his spiral down. They say tomorrow's a brand new day, but dawn felt an eternity away.

The boy made his way down the hill, stumbling slightly – just enough for the ground to bite into the knees of his jeans. Not that he cared much.

Taking a seat on the swing in his local park, he slowly swayed back and forward wondering how he'd make it through the night. Still no new messages. He fought the temptation to read some old ones. To travel back in time to a happier place.

The stranger was swift. He didn't hear him approach. Simply looked across and there he was on the swing beside him. Creepy much? Still, he didn't seem the unhinged type. In fact, if not for the pain he was currently in, the boy would even have conceded the stranger to be cute.

“I never get tired of seeing the stars,” the stranger said.

“Yeah,” said the boy, not wanting to get caught in a conversation.

“You know throughout history we've navigated by them. Maybe that's why it helps me when I'm feeling lost. A light in the dark.”

“Yeah,” said the boy hoping the stranger would get the drift that this conversation was a dead end.

“I just say that because you seem lost, too. Sometimes it helps to talk to a stranger,” he said. “I'm not crazy, I promise.”

The boy's phone beeped. He inspected it at the speed of light. Nup. It was just stupid Trish wanting the latest goss. OMG! He slid the phone back in his pocket with contempt.

“What's his name?” the stranger asked.

“What? How'd you know...?” the boy replied. Crazy or not, this was getting creepier. I should get out of here, he thought to himself. But instead he said, “Did Trish or someone put you up to this?”

“I don't know a Trish. I'm sorry, I should probably leave you alone,” he said, getting up to go.

The boy watched the stranger start to leave, then had a quick change of heart, no longer able to handle the thought of being alone again.

“His name's Sam. He's my boyfriend,” the boy said, just barely loud enough for the stranger to hear. The boy paused, as if waiting for a reaction, but none was forthcoming.

“Well, he was my boyfriend,” he continued. “Now he's Amy's boyfriend, just in time for prom. I spent the entire year campaigning the school board for students to be allowed to bring same sex partners to prom. And he'd promised. Oh yeah, by then he'd be ready for people to know,” he said, as a tear that had long been forecast began to fall.

“So he's arty but doesn't want people to know?” the stranger asked taking a seat on the swing again.

“Huh?” said the boy wiping the tear away, ashamed.

“Does he like boys or girls?”

“Oh, well he says bi. I say closet case. He's so retro. Too scared of what people will think. Doesn't realise he gets to influence that.”

“It will change one day,” the stranger said. “There'll be arty marriages - there'll even be an openly arty president within your lifetime. Discrimination against people like us will one day be a faded memory; a history lesson. As for the heartbreak – it'll take time, but you will find the one for you. One that won't be so reckless with your heart.”

“Who are you, some sort of fairy god father? I thought Cher was the patron saint of gays.”

“Who's Cher?”

“Not important. Who are you?”

“I'm just a stranger,” he said as he walked from the boy.

“Oh and Mitch,” the stranger said, as he turned back one last time. “Stay indoors and avoid any cows on October 22, 2021. Especially brown ones. It's a long story, but just trust me.”

Earth, France, Paris. March 28, 1962, 3:45am.

Pierre Boulle had seen things in his life. Many things. He'd lived in a hotel. Fought in a war. Travelled the globe as a secret agent. He had countless stories and an entertaining way of telling them. But one story he would never tell was the story of what happened on this particular night. It was just far too weird.

He'd been comfortably sleeping in his bed when he was woken by noise from another room. Normally he would assume it to be Madeleine or her daughter, but he knew they were visiting friends in Avignon this weekend. Cautiously, Pierre climbed out of bed and went about searching the apartment.

Making his way down the cold corridor, he could see light sneaking out from under the door to his study. A light he knew he had turned off before bed. He ducked into the bathroom, looking for a weapon. Toothbrush? No, on second thought... He grabbed his straight razor and flicked open the blade.

If someone had chosen this apartment to rob, they'd made a big mistake. Pierre had won several medals for bravery and heroism in the war. At the door to the study, he didn't hesitate for a second as he swung it open, ready to attack. But what he saw threw him completely off-guard.

Standing before him was someone dressed in some sort of spacesuit. The helmet was shaded over as if to obscure their face, but the oddest part was that this intruder could have been no more than three foot tall.

“Ah, I was just leaving this for you. Consider it my gift,” said the intruder, holding up what appeared to be a manuscript.

Not speaking a word of English, Pierre was confused. Then a device resting on the table in front of the intruder translated what had just been said into French.

“I like your previous novels,” the intruder continued. “You seem to have a realistic view of humans and their absurdities.”

“Most people call it a pessimistic view,” Pierre confessed.

“Fools,” said the intruder. “Anyway, I think I can trust you with this story. I hope you'll like it and see that it gets published. Maybe it will help humans learn, so that our future can be better.”

Pierre rubbed his head. This night was getting weirder. He didn't think it possible; surely it must be a dream. He always had such crazy dreams when he ate too much camembert.

“You broke into my sister's apartment in the middle of the night to give me a novel?” he asked. “What's it about?”

The intruder handed Pierre the manuscript as he replied, “It's about how in the future, apes are superior to mankind in just about every possible way.”

Pierre glanced down at the tittle page. “Monkey planet?”

“No! Not monkeys! Apes! It's called Planet of the Apes!” said the intruder agitated.

“That's what I just said! I said it was Monkey planet!” Pierre said back to the intruder in frustration.

“But it's not Monkey planet! It's Planet of the apes! Apes!”

“You keep saying the same thing!” Pierre yelled back.

The intruder looked down at the translater in front of him, confused.

“Monkeys,” he said.

“Singes,” replied the translater.

“Apes,” he said.

“Singes,” said the translater.

“Stupid French language,” muttered the intruder. “We're all the same to you humans, aren't we?” he continued his rant to the confusion of Pierre.

Then just like that, he was gone. Out the open back window and into the night. A badly-shaken Pierre sat down in his chair. Had it all been a dream? He must have been sleep walking, because at one point he had seen into the intruder's helmet and... But no, there was the manuscript still in his hand.

Only one thing left to do – make himself a very stiff drink. He opened the drinks cabinet to pour himself a scotch. That was when he had his last surprise for the night. All three of his most expensive scotch bottles were now empty.

#

Earth, Denmark, Copenhagen. July 2, 2039, 9:10pm.

Relax Frederick, he told himself. It's not exactly a life or death situation; it's just a date. And she asked you out! She's the one that should be nervous. Somehow he doubted she was the type that would get nervous though. She was stunningly beautiful, if dressed a little odd.

“And for you madam?” the waiter asked the girl.

“I'll have the rib eye steak and a coke please,” she said handing her menu back.

The waiter paused, surprised, then found his voice. “An excellent choice,” he said before leaving the two of them alone.

“Not many people are brave enough to order beef these days – not after that whole thing with the cows.”

“I don't scare easily,” she said and he believed her. “You speak excellent English by the way.”

“Thank you,” Frederick said, taking the compliment rather than telling her he wasn't actually born in Denmark. Hey, he was short, had a large nose and over-active sweat glands – he was willing to take any compliment he could get from a beautiful woman. Plus, he spent his spare time helping out at a homeless shelter, he was due some sort of karmic reward.

A long, awkward silence followed as Frederick racked his brain for something interesting to talk about.

“Did you see Mitchell West's inauguration ceremony?” he finally asked.

“No I missed it,” she replied.

“It was pretty over the top, but I guess that's what you get for electing a gay president,” he said, laughing at his comment. “But that's not what he calls it... what does he call it again? That's right, he's arty.”

“My brother's arty.”

“Oh don't get me wrong, I love arty people,” he quickly said and actually meant it. Time for a change of topic. He was starting to sweat. “You have a strange accent – you're not American are you?” he asked as the waiter delivered their meals.

“No,” she said as she took a sip of her drink. “This is Pepsi,” she said calling the waiter back over.

“Oh I'm sorry, we don't have Coke. It's pretty much the same thing though.”

She glared at the waiter before forcing a smile. “Yes, that's fine,” she said through gritted teeth, before turning her attention back to Frederick.

“So do you have an interest in American politics?” she asked.

“Not really, I find politics painfully boring. Your brother's not a politician, too, is he?”

“No, he's kind of a bodyguard,” she replied.

“Hopefully not for a politician,” Frederick joked. “I may have to hope he fails at his job.”

“You'd like to see people die?” she asked. Ok, so she wasn't one for jokes.

“Well, no, of course not,” he said as the waiter delivered their meals. “Unless they were really evil of course, like say Hitler.”

The girl gripped her knife tightly as she sliced into the steak.

“Say you could go back in time and kill Hitler before he came into power. Would you do it?” she asked.

“Absolutely,” Frederick said without hesitation.

“What if you couldn't kill Hitler. What if you were sent further back in time, to say Hitler's great, great, great, great, great grandfather? And he was just a random guy who had no idea what was to come. Not evil by any stretch of the imagination. But if you killed him, you knew it would stop Hitler being born – would you do it?”

Frederick thought on it a moment or two. It was an unusual question for a first date and he didn't want to get the answer wrong. This girl was way out of his league.

“Yes, I think I would. If killing one innocent life could save so many more lives, then yes. I'd consider it my moral duty. What about you?” he asked. The girl looked up – she'd been cutting so sharply into the steak, she'd sawn the plate in half.

“I... I don't think I could,” she finally said shakily as she put down her knife. “I'm sorry, but I have to go.”

With that the girl quickly got up from her seat and rushed out of the restaurant. Frederick Mykur would never see her again.

Earth, Australia, Victoria. November 3, 1978, 3:45pm.

This customer was plain bizarre. Why did she have to get stuck serving him? It was a Friday and all Jessica wanted was for the weekend to begin. Instead she had to deal with this guy who was clearly high on something.

“But all I want to do is open a savings account that earns high annual interest – why are you making it so difficult?” he asked.

“Sir, on the form you listed your name as being Ned Kelly.”

“Yes, and I know for a fact that's a very common Australian name in the 18^th century so stop making excuses.”

“Well for starters this is the 20^th century not the 18^th century,” she explained patiently.

“Oh, I always get confused whether you're meant to add a digit or subtract a digit when working out which century it is,” he muttered to himself.

“And that's not to mention that you put your address as being from Mars,” Jessica continued.

“I explained that that was just a bad joke,” he said as he ran his hand through his hair. “I meant the moon.”

“You live on the moon, sir?”

“Yes. Yes I do. It's quite nice there. Uh, especially in summer.”

“No one lives on the moon, sir.”

“They do so. I know man's lived on the moon since 1969. I looked it up. So why do you keep being so difficult? I only want to invest one dollar. I was busking all day to earn it.”

“Well as I keep telling you, I need to see some ID first,” she told him.

“Do you know where I could buy some?” asked the customer.

She sighed. It was going to be a long, last half hour of work.

Earth, USA, California. April 29, 1997, 10:11am.

Sergey watched the teenager sitting on the bench. He seemed lost, but then it was easy to get lost at Standford. He remembered his orientation, when Larry had shown him around campus. Everything had seemed so big and overwhelming back then. Maybe now that he knew the university backwards, he could return the favour and play tour guide.

“Do you need directions somewhere?” he asked the teenager.

“I'm searching for some people. I got told this is where the smartest minds live.”

Sergey laughed. “Well don't let Harvard or Yale catch you saying that. Who are you searching for?”

“A group of people I got separated from.”

“I could have them put an announcement over the speakers,” Sergey offered.

“No, it won't be any use. They're not here. I don't know when they are. I need to find a scientist or someone to help me track them down. You're not a scientist are you?”

“I'm doing a Ph.D in computer science. Look, if you want, you can come back to my dorm. We've got some computers set up, we could search for news of your friends on the Internet.”

“Is it self-aware yet?”

“The Internet? Ah, no, it's not self-aware yet,” said Sergey, starting to think he should perhaps take the teen to the university's medical center. “But my friend and I have built a large-scale hypertextual web search engine. Maybe you could search for your friends on that. See if it turns up any details on them.”

“A large-scale hypertextual web search engine?”

“We call it Backrub for short.”

“Backrub?”

“Yeah, we really do need to come up with a better name,” Sergey admitted, before adding, “Your accent... you're not American are you?”

“Is it a bad thing if I'm not?” the teenager asked nervously.

“No, not all. I'm originally from the soviet myself. Where are you from?”

“You wouldn't believe me if I told you.”

“Try me.”

“I'm from the future.”

Sergey laughed, then realised the kid was being serious.

“I know it probably sounds stupid to you, but I am. You see, my friends and I were searching for the third piece of the Trinity Key. The first two pieces sent us back in time, only then we accidentally killed the dinosaurs and messed up the planet.”

“Are you sure you haven't hit your head or anything recently?” Sergey asked, concerned.

“I swear to you it's true. A by-product of our incident was that we defeated the dinosaurs, earning us the third piece of the Trinity Key – only Rebecca Jorden had to send it forward in time to protect it from being destroyed by the death ray.”

“The death ray, uh-huh,” said Sergey nodding.

“So we used the two pieces of the Trinity Key to travel forward in time – her hologram said it should hone in on the right time period. Only as we got closer to the right time, it started spinning too fast for us all to keep holding onto it and we got separated and lost in time. I'm starting to think I'll be trapped in the past forever,” said the teenager on the verge of a breakdown.

“Oh, so you need the first two pieces of the Trinity key – I know where they are!” said Sergey.

“You do!?” asked the teenager, his eyes lighting up.

“Yeah, follow me. I'll take you right there.”

Sergey lead the teenager through the main quad and past Encina Hall. The teen gazed around, impressed by at the sight of the red roof tiles and sandstone masonry framed against the bright blue sky.

“I'm so relieved you have the two pieces of Trinity Key. With those two pieces I can travel through time and find my friends,” the teen said happily.

“That's great,” Sergey replied. “Just head in here,” he added, directing the teen into the Standford Hospital.

“You're keeping the Trinity Key in a hospital?” he asked, confused.

“Yeah, something like that. Just wait here,” Sergey said as he approached the ER reception desk.

“I found this guy in the main quad – think he may have some sort of head trauma,” he told the lady behind the desk. The lady leaned across, glancing over at the teen.

“He looks well enough. Get him to wait there and fill out this form,” the receptionist told him in a disinterested tone.

Sergey sat next the teenager in one of the waiting room chairs and began to run through the admittance form.

“What's your name?”

“If I fill this out, you'll give me the Trinity Key?” he asked.

“Yes, of course,” Sergey said.

“My name's Google.”

“Interesting name...,” said Sergey. “Kind of like the mathematical term Googol, except cooler... I must try to remember it,” he continued almost to himself.

But Google wasn't really listening as he was too busy watching a woman looking over a seven year old boy in one of the examination rooms.

“Billy!” Google called out, racing towards the room.

“Google, I found you!” Billy said with a big smile, before closing his eyes and drifting asleep.

“Do you know this kid?” the doctor asked removing a needle from his arm.

“Yes, yes I most certainly do,” Google replied happily. “Is he ok?”

“He should be. I just gave him a sedative. He seems to have experienced some sort of trauma. When we found him, he was covered in blood and kept muttering something about having travelled from the year 2021 and angry cows.”

“Did he have anything with him – any type of object?” Google asked.

“Now that you mention it, yes. It's over there by the bed. I've got no idea what it is,” she said, pointing to the two pieces of the Trinity Key.

“Thank you!” said Google hugging the doctor as Sergey entered the room. “And thank you my friend!” he said, dragging Sergey into a hug, as the doctor escaped the room. “I don't know how you knew that the key was here, but you did.”

Sergey looked at Google confused. “You found it?” he asked.

“Yes, and now I can find my friends,” Google told him.

Sergey was about to call the doctor back when he noticed the objects Google had pointed to were floating about an inch above the bedside table. Surely it couldn't be that...

“Google,” Sergey asked, a little embarrassed. “Is there any advice you can give me, from the future. Some words of wisdom.”

Google thought on it a moment. “Um, don't be evil,” he said with a shurg.

“I like that,” said Sergey with a smile.

A few hours later, Billy opened his eyes to find Google awake, watching over him at his bedside.

“How are you feeling?” Google asked.

“Good. I found the third piece,” Billy said softly.

“What? Where is it?” asked Google.

“It's not an it. It's a who,” Billy replied.

“Tell me, have you ever heard of Cher?”

Admiral Jules Hullster was nobody's fool, thank you very much. He took great pride in his above average mental and strategic abilities. Abilities that had seen him quickly rise up in the ranks to become Admiral at a considerably younger age than usual. That's why it caused him no small amount of displeasure that all through his life he'd had to put up with the nickname of Jules the Fool. All because Admiral Jules Hullster had had the misfortune of being born on April Fool's Day.

In primary school, he tolerated it. He was just a small kid back then, not much else he could do. By High School, he'd hit the gym and anyone who was foolhardy enough to foolishly call him a fool. But still the insult would find him and it would sting. Then, one happy day, a school counsellor took him aside and suggested a good career path could be the military. There he'd be afforded the respect he'd craved all his young life.

Jules quickly came to the conclusion that Mykur's military was the one to join. Even back then Mykur was growing in power and looking to gain more by deadly force. As Mykur came to 'franchise' more and more planets, Jules Hullster rose higher and higher in the ranks. Then the day came: Mykur announced he was to launch 366 brand new, cutting-edge W2 Class Planet Destroyers. And Jules was promoted to be Admiral in charge of one such ship.

Now, one can only imagine the look on his face when he discovered the name of his ship, for his Planet Destroyer was to be called: The Ship of Fools.

You see, as fate would have it, Mykur's military was made up almost entirely of conscripted men and women from various planets under his control. When conscription was first brought in, it was done via a lottery style draft. If you were unlucky enough to be born on the date drawn out, you were called up for service. However, as Mykur's thirst to conquer the galaxy grew unabated, so to did his need for conscripts, until eventually every date of birth had been called forward to join, creating 366 conscripted soldier squadrons.

For simplicity's sake, it was decided that each Planet Destroyer would be staffed by a conscript squad – the theory being that they should have good teamwork having been through basic training together. And so it came to be that Admiral Jules Hullster found himself onboard The Ship of Fools with over five thousand men and women sharing his April 1 birthday.

It's safe to say Admiral Hullster's mood was far from pleasant on this particular morning, as it was on every morning. But that was all set to change. For, on this particular morning, as he drank his extra strong coffee (with no sugar nor any of that artificial crap, thank you very much), he glanced at the tracking monitors and saw something he didn't expect to see: The Blackbird.

By now it was the most wanted ship in the galaxy. He'd have to be a fool not to recognise it – and Jules Hullster was nobody's fool.

#

“Earth!? Are you sure?” asked Justice.
“I know how to read a flight chart!” replied Jupiter. “We're headed straight for it.”
“But you know what Earth is these days, don't you?” Abe said.
“Of course I know. Like I said, I'm not controlling it – it's the Trinity Key!”
Almost in a synchronised motion they all turned to watch the two pieces of the key as they floated, spinning in mid-air.
“Should we knock it down?” asked Abe.
“You think that's a good idea?” replied Google.

Before Abe could answer, the two pieces of the Trinity Key started to spin together faster and faster. A whirring noise erupted from the pieces as they became just a blur. Then the small blur began to blur until it was a six foot tall blur. The blurred blur wavered like an an old tv set finding reception, until it was suddenly replaced by a hologram of an attractive young lady with long, flowing black hair.

“Hello, I am Rebecca Jorden: the keeper of the third piece of the Trinity Key,” the hologram informed them. “If you're watching this, you've proven your intelligence by solving Alexander Vogel's riddle on Atlantis and shown your heart by passing Christopher Charles's test on Super-Sunny-Happy-Bright-Fun Land. Congratulations. But now you face a test that will push your physical abilities to their very limit. A test you will most probably not survive.”
“Oh this sounds promising,” Abe muttered.

#

He had a lock on their ship! No one would call him Jules the Fool now. Perhaps Jules the Destroyer or Jules the Ruthless. Maybe even Jules the Great. This was his moment. And there was his red alert hologram button, blinking right on cue. No doubt it was Prince Mykur calling to congratulate him on his achievement.

“Hello, Jules the Grea... Ah, Admiral Hullster here,” he said answering the hologram call.
“Admiral Hullster, this is Raymond Tonkins,” said the hologram appearing before him.
“Good day, sir,” said Admiral Hullster. “I trust you received my most glorious news. I will fire on your signal.”
“I'm afraid I need to you stand down, Admiral,” Tonkins informed him.
“What!?” Why?”
“That's need to know information Admiral. I repeat, stand down and avoid any contact with The Blackbird.”
The hologram flickered off leaving Admiral Hullster shell shocked.

This must be some sort of a joke. He had a clear shot on The Blackbird – a ship whose occupants all had a kill order on their heads. In fact, they were all tied for number one spot on Mykur's 'Most Wanted Dead' list. The blood inside him boiled.

In a way, it was personal for Jules. He wanted desperately to avenge all the lives lost onboard The Leaper, the warship destroyed on Atlantis. The poor crew never stood a chance, being severely undermanned due to one of the more obvious oversights in Mykur's conscription squad strategy. It turns out, not that many people are born on February 29. Not enough to fully man a W2 Class Planet Destroyer anyway. If only they'd had enough crew to have someone monitoring the skies above, the battle on Atlantis may well have turned out differently.

That's when Admiral Hullster noticed all the balloons and streamers and banners proclaiming “Happy Birthday Everyone!” around the cockpit. That's right, he thought to himself glumly, it's April fools day. It was so hard to keep track of days out in space.
“Well no one will make a fool of me,” he said quietly to himself.
He'd suspected the hologram of Raymond Tonkins looked a little strange and now he knew the reason. It was obviously a fake. Someone's misplaced idea of a practical joke. There's no way in the world Mykur would ever have mercy on anyone. With that thought in mind, Jules turned the key on the Planet Destroyer Death Ray and typed in the activation passcode.

How high should I set the death ray? he wondered to himself. He turned the switch all the way to “Planet Destroyed” level, then paused. That could be overkill. After all, it is just a tiny vessel, he decided. Plus, the power bill from using that much energy would be extreme. Casually he flicked the switch back a few notches to “Planet Severely Messed Up” level.

No one was there to stop or question him. They were all too busy celebrating their birthdays as he pressed the FIRE button.

#

“...into a nest of possibly the most dangerous creatures known to mankind,” the hologram of Rebecca Jorden continued.
“Did she just say what I think she said?” asked Abe.
“It's impossible,” said Liberty.
“A lot of impossible stuff seems to keep happening lately,” Google pointed out.
“Look! I can see Earth!” said Billy as he pointed out a cockpit window.

“Ah guys, we've got a problem. Well, another problem,” said Jupiter, glancing down at the cockpit monitor.
“What now?”
“Planet Destroyer on our tail. Strap yourselves in! They're opening fire!” Jupiter yelled to the others as he reached for the wheel. He swung it desperately to to the right, before remembering the ship was still under the control of The Trinity Key.
“Oh, you've got to be kidding me!”

The Death Ray (which wasn't really a ray at all - more a ten mile long ball of electricity, metal and rock) raced straight towards The Blackbird at the speed of light.
“Impact in three seconds!” yelled Jupiter. Then looked at his instruments again. “Impact in seven... ten... twelve seconds?” he said confused as The Black Bird sped up to faster than light speeds, moving away from the poorly named Death Ray.

Bolts of electricity shoot out all along the outside of The Black Bird as a loud ripping noise filled the air.
“That sounded like it came from outside!” Jupiter yelled as he was forced way back into his seat by the massive g-forces they were experiencing.
“There's no sound in space,” Justice said.
“Are you sure?”
All of a sudden the black space before them ripped open, revealing a ruby and white swirl. The strangest thing of all: as they travelled through it, they could hear what sounded like elevator music. Then in an instant they were thrust out into the black of space again, Planet Earth clearly visible out the main cockpit window. Only something looked slightly different about it.

“It... it worked! Look at Earth! The shape of the continents!” said Google in disbelief.
“You mean...?”
“We've travelled back in time, like the hologram said we would! The Trinity Key, it must've created some sort of rip in the space-time continuum!”
Jupiter tentatively took the wheel of The Black Bird as he brought them closer to the planet, breaking through the atmosphere.
“Oh my... look it's a... what are they called? A pterodactyl!” Billy said as he looked out one of the windows in amazement.

Jupiter glanced back up at the ruby and white rip that they'd travelled through as it slowly started to close up. Just before it was fully closed something came rushing out of it.
“Whoa! Hold on!” Jupiter screamed as he slammed the ship to the right, just in time to avoid the Death Ray which came racing out of the rip, right at them. The crew watched as Death Ray flew past, missing them by inches before crashing into the Earth with the force of a billion atomic bombs. After a few seconds of stunned silence, Abe was the first to speak.

“Ah guys... I think we just killed the dinosaurs.”

Google stared at the stunningly attractive girl in front of him and found he couldn't think of a single thing to say. Say something smart he thought to himself. Or something funny. Or perhaps I should say something heroic. 'Hi, I'm Google Jones and I'm here to rescue you'. Or would that be pompous? What if she doesn't need rescuing. Is it chauvinistic of me to assume she would? Perhaps 'Hi, I'm Google Jones and I can rescue you... if you want. I mean, I don't mind. Either way. I'm cool'? Yeah, that could work. Has a nice casual feel about it. Oh god, she's looking at me. Wow, she's really cute when she uses her eyes. Ok, I'm going to say something. Any minute...

“Who are you?” Abe demanded as he pointed his blaster at the girl.

“I'm Uranus.”

Such a beautiful name thought Google.

“I'm afraid Olga escaped a week ago. That's when I was moved here, but for some reason they keep calling me Olga. It's possible they were trying to lure you into a trap.”

“Gee, you don't say,” said Abe, glaring across at Billy and Google.

“Hey, I know you,” said Uranus. “You're Google Jones – the chosen one!”

She knows me! She knows me! Ok, act cool. Don't say anything stupid.

“Yep,” said Google. Phew, that went well. “Google Jones is he who is me. And Uranus is who is you.” Two from two. I'm doing well!

“Uh, this is all great, but shouldn't we be escaping before we got blown up?” asked Abe.

“I'll lead the way to safety,” said Billy as he yawned, awake again.

Damn that should have been my line thought Google.

#

“You have a piece of the Trinity Key here? On your shelf?”

“Prince Mykur's feng shui expert said it clashed with the vibe he was going for in Throne Room #1. So I offered to look after it.”

Jupiter walked over to the shelf while Liberty kept her blaster aimed at Tonkins.

“How do we know it's really the Trinity Key and not a fancy paper weight. Or a bomb?”

“Just take a close look at it,” Tonkins replied.

“He's right Lib. I'm pretty sure this is the second piece,” Jupiter replied.

“How can you tell?” Liberty asked without moving her eyes from Tonkins.

“Well, it's slightly larger than the orb we collected and has more of a halo-like shape about it, but it has the same silverly, translucent look as the first piece. Plus it's hovering in mid-air above my hand.”

Liberty turned to take in the sight.

“I can't believe we actually got it,” Liberty said.

“I'm as shocked as you are,” added Tonkins dryly. “But if you want to live, you better focus on making your speedy getaway. It looks like your furry friend and kids are about to be caught breaking a prisoner out.”

#

Google watched from behind as Billy lead Uranus down the narrow corridor.

“But what do I say to her?” he asked Abe. “Write me some lines. Something romantic. Possibly about roses.”

“It doesn't work like that. If you want someone to fall in love with you, you need to actually let them get to know the real you. You can't pretend to be someone else. Just be yourself around her,” Abe replied. Then quickly added, “Although dialling back the awkwardness couldn't hurt. Oh, and try not to do that pompous git thing you do.”

“I'll do my best. Wish me luck,” Google said as he picked up his pace to catch up to the others.

“I like Uranus” Google said as he reached them.

“Huh?” said Uranus as she turned to face him.

“I like your name,” Google repeated.

“Oh, thanks. Yeah, I was born there when my parents were on holiday. My poor sister wasn't so lucky. She was born on Venus.”

Google laughed. “That is unfortunate.”

“I like your name, too,” Uranus said. “It's kind of exotic. What's it from?”

“I think it's latin for 'to search'” Google replied.

“We better hurry,” said Billy as they reached the portrait of the fat lady. “If they discover we've broken a prisoner out, dad will send the death eaters after us.”

“Death eaters?”

“It's what his security force are called.”

“What's all this chatter?” asked the fat lady as she woke up inside her painting.

“Blatant copyright infringement,” Billy told the fat lady.

“Password denied,” the fat lady responded.

“Denied. Why?”

“We're in shut down mode, all portraits have been ordered to remain frozen,” said the fat lady.

“But you can let us through, can't you?” asked Abe. “I mean we know the password, so we can't be the ones they're after.”

“What do you think I am? Some neurotic security computer! I am a lady and a lady never breaks her word. No entry!”

“We're dead,” moaned Abe.

“No there's another way. Quick, follow me if you want to live!” Billy said.

“I was just about to say that,” Google told Uranus. "Really, I was."

#

Liberty, Jupiter and Justice raced up the ramp and into The Love Crusader where they began a frantic search of the ship.

“Tonkins was right. There's no sign of them,” Jupiter finally said.

“Great! If they're not dead, I'm going to kill them!”

“Ah, that's not the worst of it guys,” Justice added looking down at the cockpit monitors. “They're starting to lock down the exits due to some security breach. If they don't get here soon, we'll be trapped.”

#

Billy led the group through one grey corridor after another until they ended up at a thick, black metal door with spikes protruding from it.

“Oh, this doesn't look ominous at all,” said Abe.

“Relax, it's just my bedroom,” Billy replied as he keyed in a code and the door hissed open.

“Oh my... uh... this is, um, nice,” said Uranus nervously as they made their way into the room. Kids toys littered the room but everyone's attention was fixed firmly on the mural painted along the walls. A mural that depicted the Mykur family's long history of patricide.

“That's, uh, an interesting piece of art,” said Abe, holding back a gulp.

“There's a lot of... red paint,” added Google.

“Yeah, that guy being decapitated over there is my great-great grandfather. Dad always said I have his eyes,” Billy replied as he pushed a toy crate out of the way and removed a section of the floor below. “We can get out through this tunnel.”

“You dug a secret tunnel out of your own bedroom?” asked Google.

“You saw the mural, didn't you? I always knew one day I'd need to escape or be killed.”

Billy was first to drop down into the tunnel, then Abe. Google and Uranus followed, finding it's kid-sized nature more claustrophobic than the others.

“So... do you come here often?” Google asked Uranus as they crawled along.

“You mean to evil, creepy castles. Not so much. You?”

“First time.” He looked across at her. “It's not that bad though, thanks to the company.” He paused, then added, “I meant you, not the monkey and the pre-schooler.”

Uranus smiled. “You're sweet. If we're not slaughtered in the next few minutes we should totally catch up for coffee sometime.”

“Oh, I'm lactose intolerant,” said Google.

“Me too! Well I used to be too, but then I took the cure.”

“My bodyguards wouldn't let me risk it. In case it had side effects.”

“But you're so brave... I used to watch all the Google Jones, Chosen One cartoons when I was a kid. Nothing scares you.”

“Yeah, they tend to exaggerate stuff a little. I'm not that brave.”

“Oh really?” said Uranus. “Because I could've sworn you were risking your life to save me.”

“Well you were sort of on the way so...” said Google as smoothly as he could manage. Up ahead Abe and Billy climbed out of the tunnel.

“Kiss me,” said Uranus.

“You mean right now? Here?”

“Yeah, that's my ship Kiss me, right up there. Billy's tunnel lead straight to my docking bay! What are the odds?”

“Ah, yeah, great,” said Google. “Yay.” Then a bit more petulantly, “Isn't Kiss me an odd name for a ship?”

“What ship did you come here on?”

“The Love Crusader.”

“Will you kids stop gossiping and get up here. Life or death situation, remember?” Abe yelled down at them. Google climbed up before helping lift Uranus out.

“We're in Bay 330, it's only a few doors down from our bay.”

“Well, I guess this is where we say goodbye,” said Uranus. “Thanks for rescuing me and good luck with the whole saving the universe thing.”

“Yeah, uh, goodbye,” said Google as he hung his head and followed Abe and Billy back towards the bay exit. Then he stopped. Sighed. Turned back and stared at Uranus as she went about getting her ship ready. Abe watched on.

“Ok. Hurry up and kiss Uranus goodbye,” he told Google. “But make it quick or you can kiss your anus goodbye.”

Google raced over and tapped her on the shoulder. She smiled.

“I... ah, is it ok if I kiss you?” he asked.

“I'll allow it.”

#

“Look! Here are they come!” Liberty said as Abe, Google and Billy came racing up the ramp.

“Let's get out of here,” said Abe as he puffed for breath when he reached the top.

“Where the hell have you been?” Liberty demanded.

“I kissed a girl!” replied Google.

“Ah, guys, change of plans – everyone into The Blackbird,” Justice said.

“Huh?”

“Security just started shutting our airlock. We won't fit through in The Love Crusader – we need to abandon it,” Justice told them.

“But we can't... all my stuff...”

“It's my ship! You can't expect me to just...”

“There's no time!” yelled Justice.

“He's right,” said Liberty. “We've got to go, and we've got to go now!”

Jupiter took one last rueful look around the ship as everyone piled into The Blackbird. He rested his hand gently on one of the walls.

“Thanks for the memories,” he said quietly before closing the door shut.

Seconds later the door flew back open as Liberty raced to the cockpit, grabbed the first piece the Trinity Key and sprinted back towards The Blackbird.

“Can't believe we almost forgot that!”

#

Prince Mykur watched on a hologram display as The Blackbird exploded out of the docking bay just before the airlock slid shut.

“I am glad you talked me into this plan, Tonkins. It's so evil, I'd almost swear I came up with it,” he said chuckling. Then added, “Make sure the records show that I did come up with it and see to it that anyone who knows that I didn't is killed.”

“As you wish my lordship.”

“It will be so much fun killing them once they've collected the final piece of the key for me. You are sure the technicians had enough time to rig the jump functionality on The Blackbird?”

“Yes, as you told them to do. In your plan. Which you created all by yourself.”

“Excellent.”

#

“That was too close!” Abe said as the Blackbird made its way from Prince Mykur's Castle.

“Are you kidding? All in all, things couldn't have gone to plan better,” said Justice. “We got what we came for... and what's this about Google kissing a girl?”

“You got the second piece of the Trinity Key?” asked Abe.

“Yep, it's right here. But we've still got no idea how to find the third piece,” Jupiter said as he took the second piece of the key out of his pocket. The halo vibrated slightly then flew bullet-like through the air. At the same the orb in Liberty's hand shot out of her grasp, joining the halo. Together they floated mid-air, the halo rotating around the smaller orb.

“Ok, that was kinda cool,” said Billy.

“Ah, guys... look at this,” said Jupiter as the lights on Blackbird's control panel lit up like Christmas decorations at a Vegas Christmas Spectacular.

“What's going on?” Liberty asked.

“It's changing our course,” Jupiter replied.

“Where's it taking us?”

“Earth.”

Previously on Into the Black: Having found the first piece of the Trinity Key, our heroes have broken into Prince Mykur's Castle in an attempt to get the second piece.

And so far, if you were to be writing a year 12 essay on this story, you could talk about the story's various inter-connecting themes such as personal sacrifice, free will versus fate, and humanity versus computerity. (But it's probably best not to mention Cher.)

And now the story continues...




Liberty entered the control room first, followed closely behind by Justice. In an instant, she'd sized up the number of guards (4), the amount of guns they carried (8) and the amount of deodrant they were wearing (0). Before the guards even had a chance to register the new smell of the pizza, Justice and Liberty had their blasters out.
“Don't die trying to be a hero – you chose the wrong side for that,” Justice told the guards. “Now drop your blasters.”
The guards did what they were told as Jupiter entered carrying the pizza boxes.
“I thought you said we were going subdue them by drugging the pizza,” Jupiter said.
“That was just to stop you eating it all,” Liberty said as she opened one of the boxes and took a slice from Jupiter. “I always get hungry on a big mission.”

Justice quickly went about tying up the guards while Jupiter and Liberty checked the security monitors.
“Tonkins is in his quarters in the west wing. If we hurry we may be able to get to him while he's alone. If he's on our side like Billy says, he could help get us into throne room #1,” Jupiter said.
“Ok, I'll stay while you and Libby get Tonkins. I can guide you and keep you updated on his movements from here,” Justice told them as he started to tap away on the monitors, bringing up various schematics and maps.
“Ah guys, you're not going to like this...,” he added.
“What?”
“To get to Tonkins, you have to go through the torture section of the castle.”

#

“I'm bored,” said Billy.
“Yes, intense life or death situations can be so tedious,” replied Abe.
“Play some video game in the rumpus room if you want. They've got an Xbox Infinity,” Google said.
“Oh, I prefer the Playstation Infinity+1,” Billy said. “Besides, shouldn't we be helping your friends?”
“Yes, I'm sure they really need the help of a seven year old. I'm sure you'd be of great use if they ran into some evil toys.”
“Well, we could try to free the princess while we wait,” Billy said.
“I liked him better when was sleeping,” Abe complained to Google.
“Princess? What Princess?” Google asked, looking up from his book.
“Princess Olga.”
“We have to rescue her!” said Google, practically jumping out of his seat.
“No way! Our orders are to stay here until the others return. They were very simple orders. 'Get killed' isn't mentioned in them once.”
“But I've met her. She's the princess from Gaia. That's my home world! We've got to save her.”
“She's right near where my bedroom used to be,” Billy said. “That's how I heard about her. I could get us there easily enough – I know a secret passage.”
“No. You're both crazy. Can't you see it's obviously a trap!?”
“It's only a trap if we get caught,” said Google as he picked up his blaster.

#

Liberty pulled the remains of the giant spider carcass off her chest as Jupiter helped her back onto her feet.
“Ok, what fun do we have next?” she asked.
“Now you're near end of the torture section,” Justice told them as he watched Liberty and Jupiter from the monitors in the security room. “To the left of you should be two doors – avoid them. They lead to the Den of Dentists and the Country Music Museum. If you continue past them and you should come to a red metal door,” Justice instructed.
“Got it,” replied Liberty as she lead Jupiter down the narrow, grey corridor. “I can see the door. Now what?”
“Make your way through that room and you'll be in Tonkins section of the castle.”
“Ok,” said Jupiter as he put his hand on the door handle.
“Just one thing,” said Jupiter. “What's in this room?”
“Uh, I don't know. It's just labelled The Fear Room.”
“We just battled ten-foot spiders, yet this is the fear room? Oh goodie,” muttered Jupiter as he opened the door and entered the room.

#

“The electronic paintings actually double as secret doorways in this part of the castle,” Billy explained as he lead them up to a portrait of a fat lady. “This short cut will get us to the Princess in no time.”
“How do we get in? It's rock solid,” Google said as he tapped the painting.
“Oi! You woke me up with all this racket!” the fat lady in the painting moaned as she came to life and moved about the painting as if by magic.
“Sorry, but I need to get through,” said Billy.
“Alright then,” the fat lady said begrudgingly. “What's the password, Harry?”
“Harry's one of my brothers,” Billy explained. “She sometimes gets us mixed up.”
“Well, hurry up. What's the password or do you want me to call the guards?” demanded the painting.
“Blatant copyright infringement,” Billy answered.
“Correct,” sighed the fat lady and the painting flickered off, leaving an open entrance for the trio to enter.

#

Jupiter watched as Liberty made her way into the room. Without warning a burst of purple gas exploded into her face she collapsed to the ground.
“Liberty!”
Jupiter quickly scooped her up and dragged her out of the room, slamming the door shit behind them.
“Are you ok?” he asked as he propped her up against the red door. No response.
“Justice are you there? Liberty got sprayed by some gas – I think it was purple. What was it? What do I do?”
“I saw it. I can't find anything on the castle's system about it – hang on I'll get answers from the control room staff.”
“Hurry,” Jupiter said as he tried to wipe Liberty's face where the gas hit. Her eyes jerked open.
“No,” she said sitting up in a panic.
“What is it?” Jupiter asked.
“I slept in!”
“What?”
“I'm going to be late for the final academy test.”
Jupiter couldn't help but let out a laugh.
“It's ok, Libby. You graduated. It's all fine. We're on Mykur's Castle ship at the moment, remember?”
“The test was on blaster technique. I'll never be good enough. I'm not going to be able to save him. I'm going to get Google and Justice and you killed,” she said, her words almost blurring together.
“It's fear gas,” Justice cut in. “You've got to keep her calm. It uses a person's deepest fears against them. If you can't keep her calm she could go into cardiac arrest.”

Liberty screamed and flailed about, banging her body into the hard metal door. Jupiter forced his arms around her, trying to keep her secure.
“It's just the gas Lib. Whatever you're seeing, it's an hallucination. You need to relax.”
“I got him killed!” she screamed. “I got them all killed! They're all dead!”
“They're not. Everyone's fine. You just need to stay calm.”
“What would you know!? You're dead too!” Liberty squealed pushing Jupiter away. When Jupiter regained his balance Liberty had her blaster pressed up to her own head.
“I can't go on,” she said, her eyes filling up with tears.
“No Lib – stop! You can't do that. Please. I can't lose you. I can't lose someone I love again.”
The words were out his mouth before he even knew what he was saying.
“Jupiter!” Justice's voice screeched from Jupiter's earpiece. “You can neutralise the effects of the fear gas with laughing gas. There should be some in the Den of Dentists.”
“Liberty, please just hold on for me,” Jupiter said.
She looked across at him with desperate eyes.
“I'm sorry,” she said softly. Gun against her head, she pulled the trigger.
“Noooooooooooooooooo!” Jupiter screamed as he rushed down beside her.
“No. Please no,” he continued to cry as he rocked back and forward, nursing Liberty's now lifeless body.

#

Billy lead Google and Abe to the prison cell room. A big metal door stood between them and the princess.
“This seems too easy,” Abe said. “Where are all the guards?”
“They don't need them – these doors are new. They're the latest, state-of-the-art advancement in security. Nothing can cut through them and the lock on that door is a 32 digit combination. It's impossible to crack - because it's not digital, computers can't even crack it. On top of all that, you need fingerprint clearance. Hopefully mine are still on the system,” Billy said.
“And you know the password?”
“Yep, it's...” Billy promptly fell asleep.
“I really don't like that kid,” Abe said. "Even more than I don't like you."
“He must still have tyrozone in his system,” Google replied. “Quick, help me get him to the keypad.”
Together he and Abe dragged Billy across the floor and placed him up against the metal door, resting his hand gently on the handprint reader. A light above the the device turned from red to green.
“Please input password. You have 90 seconds. Failure to do so will result in death,” came a bubbly voice from some speakers above the door.
“Oh great,” muttered Abe. “Any ideas?”
“1,2,3,4,5,6 etc.?” suggested Google. “I mean it has to be something fairly simple if a seven year old could remember it.”
“That's it!” said Abe, as he started punching in some numbers.
32 digits later, the lock clicked open with a satisfyingly heavy clunk.
“Billy said the doors were new – they still had the default factory password. All zeroes,” explained Abe.
With effort Google managed to pull the heavy security door open. Together, he and Abe made their way into the prison cell. What he saw inside made him gasp.
“You're not Princess Olga... where is she?”
A beautiful teenage girl stood up from her prison cell bed to greet them.

“Thank you, but our Princess is in another Castle.”

#

Jupiter cried and convulsed in the corner, his body rocking back and forward. Liberty knelt down beside him and forced a laughing gas mask onto his face.
“Breathe this in deeply. You're going to be ok,” she said to him soothingly. Jupiter started to cough as he eyes regained focus and he took in the sight of Liberty above him.
“What's going on?” he said weakly.
“You got hit with fear gas when you went into the room. Luckily I was able to drag you out without inhaling any. The gas causes fear-based hallucinations – you nearly went into cardiac arrest.”
“Oh,” said Jupiter as he slowly started to realised what had happened. It had been he who went into the room first, not Liberty.
“At times I got the sense you could hear what Justice and I were talking about. What were you hallucinating?”
“Um... Heights. I hate heights,” Jupiter said.

“Liberty, I've managed to get the fear gas turned off. You should be able to make it through the room safely now,” Justice instructed from the control room.
“Quick, let's get this done with,” Liberty said, as she helped Jupiter back onto his feet.
The room behind the red door was no bigger than a room of the same size. Jupiter and Liberty quickly made their way through it and out into a corridor.
“Do you see a green door? There should be one on the left. That's Tonkins quarters,” Justice told them.
“Yep, I see it,” said Jupiter as he reached for the door.
“Why don't you let me enter first this time,” Liberty said with a smile as she pushed her way into the room ahead of him.

Inside she found a thin, odd-looking man writing at an old, oak desk.
“I prefer writing in the ancient method,” he said, before looking up at his visitors. “Now, tell me why I shouldn't have you killed?”
Liberty raised her blaster at him.
“I think you'll find we have the advantage in this situation,” she said calmly.
“An illusion. Ignorance, you see, isn't an advantage,” Tonkins replied as he continued to write in an open journal on his desk.
“Billy sent us to find you,” Jupiter said. “He said you could help us.”
“I don't know a Billy. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to end your lives now,” Tonkins said.
“Blade – you knew him as Blade,” Jupiter said quickly. Tonkins set down his pen and looked back up at them.
“You've seen Blade?”
“He's here,” said Jupiter.
“What! You idiots! Do you know how hard it was to get him to safety? And you brought him back here!”
“Well if you want him to stay alive, you need to get us to throne room #1.”
Tonkins coughed on some laughter.
“We're serious,” said Liberty, placing her finger on the blaster trigger.
“But it's madness. To get to throne room #1 you'll need to make it through the five fire pits, past the havoc beast, sail the wave pool of acid that leads to the swamp of eternal doom. And that's the easy part. From there you need to...”
“You can give us the directions on the way. We're not leaving here without the second piece of the Trinity Key.”

“Oh, the Trinity Key,” he said surprised. “Why didn't you say so? It's just over there on my shelf.”

“It can't be done,” Abe said defiantly. “Central says Mykur is currently in the Strawberry Milky Way Galaxy. We don't have enough fuel. Plus, we'd need to buy false documentation – they'll be on the lookout for The Love Crusader. We're talking 500,000 credits at least.”

“We can buy that stuff on the way,” Jupiter countered.

“Um, not necessarily,” Justice replied. “Our income from the Intergalactic Council has been frozen now there's a death order is on our heads. How much money do you and Abe have?”

“You think we would have signed on for this mission if we had any money?” said Abe dryly.

“Central: bring up bank account records for Liberty and Justice Forall,” Liberty said.

A hologram screen appeared before her with bank account details. Jupiter whistled.

“One million credits: I thought you said the Council had frozen the income they paid you,” Jupiter said.

“They have,” Liberty replied, her face slightly blushing. “It seems these credits are royalties from the sales of the dance track Are you sure the Martians' hideout is here?”

“You made a dance track?” asked Justice confused.

“It's a long story.”

“Ok, so say we could make it to the castle ship, how can we get in? We don't even have the security code,” Abe said.

“Oh I know that,” said Billy happily.

The crew watched Billy intently as he finished taking a big sip of his milkshake.

“That's yum,” he said, placing the drink back down on the table. “But yeah, the castle's security code is password.”

“Password? But that's insane! That's way too easy to guess,” said Google in disbelief.

“That's the point, silly head. Dad wants people to break in – then he can torture them. The whole castle is just a series of traps. It's much harder to get into throne room #1, that's where he keeps all his most valuable trophies. We'll need Tonky's help for that.”

“You mean Tonkins? Raymond Tonkins? Mykur's second-in-command, Raymond Tonkins?” Liberty asked.

“Yeah, I call him Tonky,” Billy replied. “He's the one who got me out to the Mallacandra when my dad wanted me killed. We can trust him.”

“You sure of that? He loaded you up with so much Tyrozone it's amazing you survived,” Liberty said.

“It needed to look convincing,” Billy replied as he sucked the milkshake dry.

Jupiter moved away from the main group, making his way to the cockpit lounge recliner. He was resting there, deep in thought, when Liberty approached.

“Something about Billy is bothering you, isn't it?” she asked.

“Yes.”

“Care to talk about it?”

“Not just yet,” he replied. “No offence.”

“That's ok, but you can trust me, you know.”

“I know,” he said, looking her in the eye. “It just might be safer this way.”

“So what's the plan?”

“You're asking me?”

“Of course, but if your plan's stupid, I'll knock you out and take control,” she replied. Jupiter stood up from the recliner.

“The plan is: let's bring down an evil empire.”

“That's nice and dramatic – like if this were a book, that's where I'd probably put the end of the chapter, but I was kind of hoping you'd have something a little more specific.”

“They've had the galaxy's greatest strategists prepare their systems for every conceivable attack. There's no sane approach they won't see coming.”

“Why do you think I'm letting you come up with the plan?” Liberty said with a smile.

#

The Love Crusader's engines died down to a dull roar as it approached Prince Mykur's behemoth castle ship.

“You need to head underneath the moat,” Billy said pointing at the monitor. “That's where the docking bays are. And hail the Control Room before they open fire.”

“Hello Space Castle One, this is Pizza Pizza, we've got your order of five Carnivore Carnage Pizzas,” Jupiter said into the microphone.

“Ah, we don't have any record of a pizza order,” came the reply over the speaker.

“Oh, well we got told the security code is password. So we'll just drop them off and be on our way.”

“No. There must have been some mix up. Or maybe pranksters called the order in.”

“You didn't order the Carnivore Carnage?”

“No, we didn't order any pizzas! Please turn around immediately or we'll be forced to open fire.”

Liberty gave Jupiter a concerned look. Jupiter winked back at her.

“Oh that's too bad Space Castle One, because we didn't deliver them within the first 45 minutes, you could've had the pizzas for free.”

A long pause.

“Land in Docking Bay 327 and await further inspections.”

Abe carefully guided the ship under the moat to the sea of docking bays.

“There's number 327,” said Jupiter pointing towards one of the smaller airlock doors that was slowly sliding open.

“Makes sense,” said Liberty. “According to Billy's layout, this should place us near the Control Room – obviously they like their pizza.”

The Love Crusader touched down lightly inside the space castle.

“Well, here goes nothing,” said Jupiter as he put on his Pizza Pizza cap. Liberty and Justice did likewise.

“Abe, if you don't hear from us in 60 minutes, get Billy and Google out to safety.”

“Don't worry Jupe – If I don't hear from you in 59 minutes, I'm out of here.”

The door leading to The Love Crusader's ramp slid open. Jupiter paused, looking out at the docking bay before turning to face Liberty and Justice.

“Let's bring down an evil empire.”

“Are you completely insanely mad?” Jupiter asked as he turned the heating up on the Blackbird.

“Admit it, you're a little turned on, aren't you?” Liberty replied with a smirk as she punched some numbers into the navigation system.

“Explain it to me one more time.”

Liberty gently lowered Billy onto one of the Dead-Ezy teleportation chairs.

“It's simple – we attempt consecutive jumps. It's like the difference between throwing a stone into a lake versus skimming the stone across the water.”

“But skimming a stone doesn't kill me several times.”

“There's no other option. The army will be patrolling every teleportation station within a jump from here. If we can pull off five consecutive jumps we could be at Atlantis in the blink of an eye.”

“Or dead.”

“Yes: or dead. Every plan has its pros and cons. Look, we're young enough – in theory our bodies might be able to handle five consecutive jumps.”

“In theory because no one's ever been insane enough to risk it before!”

“Well I'd rather die in my death than be killed by Mykur,” Liberty said. Followed closely by, “Huh?”

“What is it?” Jupiter asked.

Liberty looked up from the monitor attached to the Dead-Ezy chair.

“The computer's found high traces of tyrozon in Billy's blood.”

“Tyrozon?”

“An extremely powerful and dangerous tranquilliser.”

“Why on Mars would Harvard and Belle drug him?”

“Well if we get out of this, let's be sure to ask them.”

#

“This isn't going to work,” Justice complained.

“Trust me,” replied Abe. “We go way back. I survived two rooms of death thanks to this insane computer. Look it's replying.”

The words I'm not supposed to alter the flight path. It would be very naughty of me. scrolled across the screen.

Abe quickly read the message and typed back.

That's too bad because we found the galaxy's biggest dolphin!

Oh! Can I kill it and swim in its skin? asked The Harland's security computer. Followed by: Please.

Yes! It said that's what it wanted you to do! Abe wrote back.

Aw, that news is like a sweater for my heart. :-) the computer replied.

“A sweater for its heart?” asked Google.

“Warms its heart,” explained Abe. “Keep up.”

I'm sending you the co-ordinates of the dolphin now. Abe wrote as he uploaded the position of the Planet Destroyer.

Oh pretty! That big dolphin looks exactly like a W2-class Planet Destroyer. I never knew they were so beautiful. How do I murder it?

“It just might have a chance if it crashes into the destroyer's engines. It's best shot is coming in from above. The destroyer hopefully won't be watching the skies if it's focused on us,” said Justice, starting to get excited.

If you whack it on the head at full speed, that should do.

Oh this will be fun – can we slaughter turtles next? They should be crunchy.

“You sure do have strange friends,” Justice muttered.

“Um, forgive me if you've already thought of this, but say that crazy ship does manage to bring down the Planet Destroyer... won't the Destroyer crash into Atlantis? You know, the place where we currently are.”

“Every plan has pros and cons,” said Justice. “That's why we need to go shopping.”

Inside the Atlantis Sports Megastore, Justice quickly directed them to the scuba section.

“Get changed into these quickly,” he said as Abe and Google grabbed some suits and headed to the change rooms. “Oh, but first... which do you think suits me more – the blue or the red wetsuit?” he asked.

Freshly changed (Justice in a blue wetsuit) they made their way back towards the computer when a hologram of Prince Mykur appeared before them.

“So, have you agreed to my demands?” he asked with a snarl.

Justice glanced across at the computer screen just in time to see the words Dolphin! Dolphin! I see you! Is it ok to kill you now? scroll across the screen.

“I'm afraid we find your offer unacceptable,” Justice told the hologram. Mykur silently went red with rage.

“Have a nice explosion,” he said before turning to his right. “Hail the Destroyer and instruct them to fire at will.” The hologram flickered off.

Abe rushed to the computer:

Yes, the dolfhin wants you to kill it right now!

Dolfhin!? But I wanted to kill a dolphin not a dolfhin. :'-(

Sorry, I meant to write dolphin. Just a typo.

:-)

The trio looked up through the glass ceiling just in time to see The Harland spaceship splash through the water headed straight for the Planet Destroyer.

“It's slowing down!” groaned Justice.

“It's not built for water – it'll never have enough power,” Google added.

DDDDDDDooooooooollllllllpppppppppphiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnn time!

“Have some faith,” said Abe with a smile as The Harland somehow managed to find new energy reserves as it slammed into the Planet Destroyer at top speed. “I'm going to miss that computer,” he added with a sigh.

“It worked,” gasped Justice. “I can't believe it, but it actually worked!”

Fire and smoke erupted from the Planet Destroyer as its collapsing metal shell groaned like a dying beast.

“Time to make our getaway,” Justice added as the massive ship quickly began to spiral into a nosedive, headed straight for the casino.

“Uh, what do we do once we reach the ocean top?” asked Abe as he swung open the airlock door.

“One thing at a time,” replied Justice. “One thing at a time.”

#

“Oh god I feel like my brain was pulled out through my nose, rubbed around a toilet bowl rim and then shoved back in,” groaned Jupiter.

Liberty vomited at his feet.

“Yuck, my mouth feels like I swallowed a decomposing skunk. How's the kid?”

“Still sleeping.”

“How can anyone sleep through being killed five times?” Liberty asked as she groggily picked herself up off the ground and looked out a window.

“Where are we?” Jupiter asked.

“All I can see is water – and it keeps moving. Oh no...” More vomit splashed across the floor.

Jupiter struggled his way into the cockpit.

“We made it,” he called back to Liberty. “We're at Atlantis.”

“Stop stuttering,” Liberty barked back before passing out into one of the chairs.

When Liberty came to she was back on-board The Love Crusader in her own quarters, resting in bed with a drip in her arm.

“Ah, you're awake,” Jupiter said gently.

“Oh god, how long have I been out? I'm sorry about... It's so embarrassing.”

“Don't be silly,” Jupiter told her. “You don't always need to act so invincible. Sometimes it's ok to be let people see that you're... vincible.”

“I'll try to keep that in mind,” she said with a smile before pulling the drip out of her arm. “Now how are you going locating the others?”

“Relax, I've already picked them up – they're drying off in the cockpit. It looks like they had quite the swim on Atlantis.”

“They're here!? Why didn't you say something!?” Liberty willed herself out of bed before collapsing against Jupiter.

“Do you want me to carry you?” he teased.

“Do you want me to knock you out?” she replied.

With Jupiter's assistance Liberty entered the cockpit to find a heated discussion taking place.

“I'm not saying we give him our piece of the key! I'm just saying we should hide while we can,” said Abe.

“With the kill order in place, our funds from the Intergalactic Council have been frozen. We'll starve to death if we hide.”

“But we'll be killed to death if we attempt to get the second piece of the key from Mykur!” countered Abe.

“Huh? What's going on?” asked Liberty confused.

“Mykur beat us to the second piece of the key,” Jupiter told her.

“Please tell me you're joking.”

“Unfortunately he's not,” said Google. “So instead of avoiding Mykur, we've somehow got to break into his castle."

“Which only happens to be the most highly guarded ship in the universe,” Abe added.

“Um, I might be able to help with that,” said a meek voice from the corner of the room. Everyone slowly turned to face Billy.

“Oh yeah, I've been meaning to ask: Who the hell is he?” said Abe.

“I'm Blade - Prince Mykur's fifth son. But you can call me Billy,” he said with a smile.